Some advice that I gave to a friend recently has inspired me to write this post. I truly believe in the following sentence:
Your beauty is not in your body, but in your heart and soul.
Physical beauty is something that is revered all over the world. And this physical beauty changes depending on cultural norms. For example, in the Western world we are obsessed with thin body beauty ideals as well as curvy Kardashian figures (only if it is in the right places though… right?) and “fit” bodies. In other parts of the world it may be a larger body type that reigns as the most beautiful.
The reality is that all bodies are beautiful. There is physical beauty within all of them because there is no one right way to have a body. Whatever body God/The Universe gave you is beautiful. I don’t think the incredible and divine energy that created your body got it wrong…
What is wrong though is the societal norms that determine if one body is beautiful over another. Because true beauty never comes from our outside appearance. That is all ego. True beauty comes from within. It comes from our hearts and it comes from our souls.
We need to stop trying to mould our bodies into a societal beauty standard that is unattainable for the vast majority of people without a punishing, restrictive and disordered eating and fitness regime. All our bodies are naturally so different and that is a magical and wonderful thing.
Because when our life comes to an end, are we going to be super stoked that we spent so much time starving ourselves to get “that body”? Are we going to be proud of ourselves that we never ate any cake and had so much “discipline” so we could have a “flat stomach”? Are we going to be really happy that we missed out on fun at the beach because we thought we were “too fat” to wear a swimsuit? (You are never too fat to wear a swimsuit BTW). Are we going to feel satisfied that we never enjoyed food with our loved ones because we were always on a diet? Are we going to be overjoyed with the fact that we spent SO MUCH mental and physical energy in pursuit of a “perfect body” that does not exist? Are we going to feel pumped that we agonised over every calorie we ate and could never eat anything without worrying about it?
I THINK THE ANSWER IS NO!
Life is meant for living. You are here to SHINE YOUR LIGHT. You are here to live a life that nourishes your soul. You are here to help serve others, be kind and spread love. You are here to enjoy your life and not be a slave to a certain “beauty ideal”. And focusing on the size of your body is never going to bring soul satisfying nourishment. It is because you are not satisfied on an emotional and soul level that you go after the toxic enchantment of the “perfect body” in the first place.
I know it is not east to let go of manipulating your body. We do it because so many other people do it, and in our sometimes sick and twisted society it is applauded to have a “perfect body”. It is seen as being better than others if you can maintain a certain figure. It is guised under being “healthy” when what is truly healthy involves nourishing your mind, body and soul. Health is not restricting yourself mentally, emotionally and physically in pursuit of a beauty ideal that is NOT achievable without feeling crazy and obsessive around food and exercise. Health is not being restricted from enjoying life because you are so attached to how you look.
Let’s help to create a new norm. One of loving and accepting your body and letting it be what it was created to be. A norm where we nourish our bodies so that we can live our lives to the full. A norm where we value soul and heart beauty over the size of someones bum. A norm where we value how kind hearted someone is over the amount of cellulite they have. A norm where our body size, type, shape, ability etc does not even come into our worth as a person or the “beauty” someone has. A norm where we work on loving ourselves and growing our inner light.
Because a hugely important point is that you do not exist to be beautiful. You do not exist to be aesthetically pleasing in whatever culture you live in. You are an infinite, divine being full of incredible light. You are SO MUCH MORE than what your earth suit/body looks like.
And I know this isn’t an easy journey, it has taken me many years to get to this point and I can still have little thoughts pop up in my head about changing my body. For example, I have a wedding in Bali to attend this Summer and my old little body thoughts are like girl you need to look good for that. Yet I am in a place now where I shut that shit down because I AM SO MUCH MORE THAN WHAT I LOOK LIKE. I am not a better person for having a toned bum or not. What matters is my heart and my soul and how kind I am. People are not going to remember whether I looked fat in a swim suit but they will remember if I am a miserable bitch because I am obsessing over what I eat. You get me?
Let go of the toxic body ideals. Let go of the toxic body thoughts. For you are so much more than what your body looks like.
Love yourself and let love shine out of you. That is what is truly beautiful anyway.